Chapter Six – Becoming a Resonant Leader: The Five Discoveries

Though I enjoyed this book overall and found it to be a very useful tool for leaders looking to improve their effectiveness, I found a number of places where it felt like it was stretching an important topic beyond necessity, just to fill space. This entire chapter felt that way. The title refers to the five discoveries a leader needs to go through to become resonant. However, these discoveries are not mentioned until the last page. This chapter is a pre-amble to the actual content discussed in next few chapters. Having said that, I will mention a few nuggets in this pre-amble that jumped out at me.

They discuss the importance of a leader being in tune with their leadership effectiveness. Those who know their actual strengths and weaknesses, can address and work on the gaps. Those who don’t, have little chance of improving their deficiencies. One barrier to such accurate self-assessment is what the authors refer to as “CEO disease.” The hierarchy that exists in most companies actively insulates them from true information about their own performance. In most cases, no one approaches the CEO or executives to offer up constructive criticism. Even when the executive asks for feedback, it is often sugar-coated or people simply leave out anything that might sound negative for fear of falling out of favor with the higher ups. They could have gotten right to the point here and said that this challenge is reduced when a leader is emotionally intelligent and creates open lines of communication with their team, presents themselves as more accessible, works over time to build relationships with people at all levels of the organization, etc. But they didn’t.

The chapter then goes on to talk about nature vs nurture. Are great leaders born or made? They discuss reasons that leaders don’t change (they don’t believe they need to, they don’t believe they can, they come from a command or pace-setting background that has been firmly ingrained in their behavior). After a case study of a CEO who did make a dramatic shift, they claim it can be done and the discussion progresses through ways of changing. Classroom training on leadership, they say, is ineffective. Months after the training, their research says that only 10% of the material is retained and/or embedded into their behaviors. A lot of this, they say, has to do with motivation. When someone has a leadership class thrust upon them as part of a corporate learning and development strategy, they are not motivated internally to change, so they won’t. Or, if they do, this change extinguishes quickly…as they say, “once the brow-beating ends.” I related this concept to animal training (of course). Negative reinforcement works quickly to affect behavior change, but the results disappear soon after you stop following them around to administer the punishment. Positive reinforcement takes longer to succeed, but the results remain in tact much longer after the reward is removed.

Next they talk about the way the brain affects all of this. They refer back to the earlier discussion of our decisions and behavior being the result of a dialogue between the rational and emotional centers of the brain. When training only engages the rational part, the learning moves quickly but doesn’t stick. When it also engages the emotional centers, it takes a bit longer, but the results stay with a person much longer, but they are emotionally plugged into the learning. They go on to talk about neuro-plasticity. It had been believed that once neurons were completely developed in adulthood, they could not change or grow. New research shows that this is false. Though the change happens more quickly and easily up through your early 20s, a sustained effort to change ways of thinking can, and does, work quite well into adulthood.

The chapter ends with the notion of self-directed learning. They explain that this slower, more challenging task of changing fixed behavior patterns in adults is most effective when it is self-directed. If a person recognizes a need to change and is motivated to do so, they take initiative on their own and put in the time and work needed to make it stick. This leads into the introduction (on the last page) of the process they suggest for a leader to engage in the change process: The Five Discoveries. These are actually discussed in the next chapter.

Chapter Five - The Dissonant Styles: Apply with Caution

This chapter focused on the last two styles. Though these styles have their place in leadership, the authors feel that on their own, they represent an emotionally unintelligent approach.

The Pacesetting Style

This style is typified by a leader who drives an aggressive pace at work. It can be useful effectively in the start up phase of a company, or it can be used when the team is highly motivated, and need little direction. In both these cases, the staff just needs someone to push or drive them to action.

They warn, however, that while pressure can energize some people, it can also be debilitating (over time). Pace setting leaders do well at gaining compliance from their team, but they rarely get commitment. This style is most dangerous when coupled with a lack of empathy: a leader cannot see the distress their fast and furious style is affecting Thursday.

The Commanding Style

This style’s motto is “Do it because I said so.” Reflective of an extremely hierarchical leadership structure, where the boss is king and the workers do as they’re told, this style is another that, when used by itself, causes dissonance in the organization. There are times (of emergency or crisis) when commanding is needed. Otherwise, however, the authors believe it’s the most damaging style. The lack of praise and free-flowing criticism that comes with a commanding style, can erode people’s spirits.

The authors then talk about a study that was conducted with 2 million employees of 700 US companies. They found that their length of service with the company was directly related to their relationship with their immediate boss.

The chapter ends with a recap of the styles and then states that according to their work, a truly successful leader is one who masters several the competencies, and knows how and when to apply which. 

Chapter Four – The Leadership Repertoire

This chapter dives into leadership styles. Just like all intellectually intelligent people are not smart in the same areas, emotionally intelligent leaders vary a bit as well in the way they demonstrate their EI. The authors go on to say that truly successful leaders have varying degrees of success at utilizing more than one style and can pick the one that is needed as the situation dictates.

There are a total of six styles. The first four, according to the authors, are solidly successful EI styles. The last two can be useful in some scenarios, especially when combined with some of the first four, but on their own, they can actually be damaging to the organization (causing dissonance).

This chapter covers just the first four (resonant) styles, leaving the last two for the next chapter.

The Visionary Leader-

            This is the leader who not only creates a vision for an organization, but is adept at motivating the masses to jump on board that vision, take ownership of it and help to move it forward. They are willing and enthusiastic about sharing information. “While some managers might have the misimpression that withholding information gives them power, visionary leaders understand that distributing knowledge is the secret to success; as a result, they share it openly and in large doses.” (p. 58-59). They go on to say that their research suggests this style is the most effective of the six. Getting people to follow a vision reminds people of the larger purpose of their work, which lends powerful meaning to an otherwise boring experience at work.

The Coaching Style

            The foundation of this style is personal conversations which build relationships with individuals. The on-going conversation that exists between leaders and employee helps the employee to view the leader’s constructive feedback as helpful, rather than punitive. The empathy and rapport that the leader demonstrates has a very positive impact on the employees state of mind and their performance. Their actions say “I believe in you and I expect your best efforts.” Employees who work for this type of leader have an inherent desire to succeed so as not to let the leader down. The authors caution that when executed poorly, this style of leadership can move into the realm of micro-managing.

The Affiliative Style

            These leaders , place a lot of emphasis on keeping harmony within the group, and less emphasis on accomplishing specific tasks and goals. They want to keep people happy and create harmony, or resonance. This style is particularly successful when trying to mend fences on a team with damaged relationships or broken trust. While this type of leader builds esteem, relationships and good will within an organization, it is best used in conjunction with another style, such as visionary. When used on its own, leaders will often fall short in the areas of holding people accountable for their tasks.

The Democratic Style

            These leaders like to talk through ideas with their teams. They value consensus and the buy-in that it brings. They give an example of a nun tasked by the archdiocese with shutting down the local school that she runs. Rather than just shutting it down, she held community meetings with local parents over the next several weeks to brainstorm ways that it could stay open despite the financial loss it was incurring each year. At first the parents were extremely upset. By the end of the sessions, they had come to the conclusion on their own that there really was no way to save the school. When it finally shut down, the head nun, sister Mary, received none of the backlash from the community, as she had taken her time to allow them to come to the decision on their own. The authors caution that you have to be thick skinned to use this style. If you ask for feedback, you need to be prepared to get it. The most important competencies for this style are: teamwork and collaboration; conflict management; and influence. The inherent danger with this style is that things can take a long time when you’re unable to act without having discussion about every topic.  

Again, a healthy combination of the above leadership styles, adjusting to the needs of individual situations and people, is the ideal way to be a resonant leader. 

Chapter Three - Neuroanatomy of Leadership

Despite the title, this chapter focuses primarily on introducing the four domains of emotional intelligence. There is a little attention given to the brain activity connected to these four domains, but not much.

It opens with an interesting study in which they tracked executives interviewing for jobs. They recorded the number of times each candidate got a laugh during the interview when they said something witty. They then compared this with future data they collected on the executives’ success within the new company. They found that the outstanding/high performing leaders got a laugh during their interview about twice as often as the ‘so-so’ leaders. Apparently, the ability to resonate with someone and get them to laugh has a direct impact on your ability to lead and succeed.

To lead into the four domains, they mentioned a thought from sociologist Max Weber who said “institutions that endure thrive not because of one leader’s charisma, but because they cultivate leadership throughout the system.” (p. 36).  I like that idea. It reminds me of something I say in my leadership classes through Disney Institute. People always want to hear about “Walt the innovator” and the things he did to helm the company and the brand from poverty to success. As of 2011, the Disney company has been around longer without Walt’s leadership than it was under his leadership. The continued success is a testament to the notion that it wasn’t just this one man who steered the ship, but the culture he created and left behind for the company. This same thing is achievable in any organization.

The four dimensions of EI and their associated competencies are:

·      Self-Awareness

o   Emotional self awareness

o   Accurate self assessment

o   Self confidence

·      Self-Management

o   Emotional self control

o   Transparency

o   Adaptability

o   Achievement

o   Initiative

o   Optimism

·      Social Awareness

o   Empathy

o   Organizational awareness

o   Service

·      Relationship Management

o   Inspirational leadership

o   Influence

o   Developing others

o   Change catalyst

o   Conflict management

o   Building bonds

o   Teamwork and collaboration

The authors claim that no one can be outstanding at all these competencies, but an emotionally intelligent leader demonstrates mastery of at least half of dozen of them, preferably at least one from each domain.

Chapter Two: Resonant Leadership

This chapter just digs a little deeper into the defining characteristics and effects of resonance and dissonance in leadership. Resonance, it explains, comes from the notion of sound or music. When frequencies are in aligned there is harmony. Dissonance represents a state where there is a lot of "signal noise." These two states have a marked effect on the way people perform at work. The authors talk about the vital importance of people's ability to connect with others at work. Everyone likes to be part of something bigger than themselves, so it a good feeling when a team project comes together well and the various people involved (assuming they feel a connection to each other) can celebrate and feel good about it together. These positive feelings of connection drive people to achieve more together. On the other hand, if the leader creates an environment of dissonance, people will simply go "through the motions of their work...doing merely a good enough job rather than giving their best." This statement resonated with me (no pun intended) as it is very similar to the notion I shared in the opening post about my leadership style being linked to principles of positive and negative reinforcement in animal training.The former has no ceiling to the heights people (or animals) will go to achieve more. The latter works well and quickly, but it typically results in people doing just what they need to do to avoid the punishment, so there is a limit to the heights they can achieve.

As the chapter began to dive into dissonant leadership, I was surprised to read of a study of more than a thousand US workers which found that 42 percent reported cases of yelling and other types of verbal abuse in the work place. 30 percent of the people studied admitted to having yelled at co-workers themselves. The company I work for is quite large and has it's share of challenges but we have an organizational culture that simply does not allow for such behavior. I've been working there in one capacity or another, for 16 years so it's hard for me to imagine that kind of behavior happening at work. The authors discuss the toxicity this causes and how it can pervade a person's work space, as well as their home since they can't just shake it off at 5pm. The results are employees who are burned out, dispirited, and looking for another job. Or worse, staying in a job they hate and adding to the organizational dissonance. The authors compare these types of leaders to the "dementors" in the Harry Potter books who drain all the peace, joy, and hope from people. I found that to be a fun diversion in an otherwise stoic book (so far).

The remainder of the chapter talks about the important balance between the emotions and intellect in leadership. Often intellect it touted as a key predictor of success or failure in leadership. While a leader must have certain knowledge, skills, and intellect to run a team, a big brain is simply not enough. They talk about the fact that thinking brain (frontal cortex) evolved from the emotional brain (limbic system). During times of emergency, the emotional centers of the brain always get control of a situation. If there's a fire, we sense the threat and jump into action to get ourselves and perhaps others out of harms way. However, the leader never learned or can't remember the safety protocols in a fire, then their emotional drive to act has no direction. The most successful leaders, they say, are the ones who most perfectly balance these two parts of the brain. I know I've seen this in action and I'm sure most others have too. You want a leader who knows more than you and can teach you, or a leader who is great at what they do and can perform at a very high level. But you also want a leader who is in touch with you and your needs as well as those of the overall department. Too much intellect and high performance in a leader who burns every bridge they cross is not good. Too much affiliation and emotional support from a leader who cannot get their job done effectively is similarly, not a good thing. The person who balances these two and makes good choices with both ends of the spectrum in mind is a successful and well-respected leader.

Chapter One: Primal Leadership

The first chapter of the book opens up by explaining the double meaning of the title. "The emotional task of the leader is primal--that is, first--in two senses: It is both the original and the most important act of leadership." It goes on to talk about the notion that since organized human civilization began people have needed a leader they can follow and look to for support. This chapter also introduces two terms that appear frequently throughout the book.
Resonance is when a leader drives positive emotions in the people who follow them, bringing out their best.
Dissonance is when a leader drives negative emotions in the people who follow them, which undermines people's ability to perform at their best.
The chapter also talks a lot about the open loop of the limbic system, which controls our emotions. This emotional center is considered an open loop because it is impacted by external factors. As others demonstrate strong emotions (positive or negative), our own limbic system reacts and often comes in line with the emotional stimuli around it. So, if you're relaxed and happy walking into a meeting but everyone else is angry and stressed out, you will begin to feel that way too after a period of time in the room with these other people. It refers to this as 'contagion.' All the discussion of brain physiology leads up to the notion that while we all impact each other emotionally, the boss is the one who has the most impact. People are always looking toward the boss for direction. His or her behaviors have the strongest effect on those in the room or in the office.
In my own leadership development classes, we refer to this as the idea that every leader is telling a story about what they value and believe whether or not they mean to or even realize it. Actions speak much louder than words. A leader may view themself as being very open and warm, or committed to work and passionate about their career. Maybe they see themselves as someone who loves to develop people, or as a highly efficient leader. All of this internal characterization means very little if our external behaviors don't align with the way we perceive ourselves. We tend to judge ourselves by our intentions, while others judge us by our actions, since they see our intentions. A great challenge to a leader is to take a week to step outside of themselves and 'observe' all their behaviors at work. Do they observable behaviors support the story you think you're telling? Or do they undermine that story?
The rest of the chapter references quantitative research that demonstrates the business results behind positive leadership. There are studies quoted about cardiac unit death rates with nurses who demonstrate positive vs negative emotions with their patients; and CEOs and their top management teams who regularly demonstrate positive emotions and behaviors and the correlated business results of the company. They talk about studies which have shown that 1% increase in positive service climate between happy employees and customers results in a 2% increase in revenue for the company. The bottom line for this chapter is about setting up the framework that the better leaders (at all levels of the organization) are able to demonstrate positive emotions in the workplace, the more successful the company, it's employees, it's customers, and it's bottom line business results will be.